3.5 Year Canundrum
Posted by helmut
I’m not sure if it’s the onset of 100 degree days, the obscene amount of caffeine I’ve had today or the fact that i haven’t seen my family in 6 months and have no plans to see them in the near future that have me desperately wanting to move back to Pennsylvania. Whichever it is i’m sure the urge will pass soon enough. Or maybe it won’t. Where the heck are we supposed to live?! Helmut and I have asked ourselves this question numerous times all of them ending with no answer. Should we live near my family and friends, or his family? Apparently we can’t decide so we landed in Austin, a sort of middle ground, far away from EVERYBODY, but at least there’s lots of work here. We’ve been here for 3.5 years now and are still feeling uprooted, like we can’t quite dig our feet in. I miss living around people that i’ve known since i was a kid and have known me. Making friends is tough, and keeping them is even tougher….and if i may say, starting from scratch in a place where everybody seems to have a core group of friends stinks.
Today Hayden called one of his little friend’s grandma’s “grandma.” I love that he did. I thought it was so sweet, but at the same time it got me to wondering, is this how it’s meant to be? Is he going to grow up steeling other kid’s grandparents because none of his own live anywhere near here? Food for thought. It takes a weird toll on the psyche not feeling like you belong.
One Response to “3.5 Year Canundrum”
Leave a Reply
June 25th, 2009 at 11:22 am
Hey Kari,
It felt like I was reading my own writing. We live a 15 hour drive from my parents, and a 10 hour drive from Jesse’s. Needless to say we don’t see our families very often either. I have the same question….is this how it is really meant to be?? Somehow I don’t think so. I don’t know if it is natural to be so cut off from family. I always say I would make a really good Hudderite or Amish person because I love the idea of communal living. Obviousel they have ideas I don’t agree with, but the way they live together and work/play as a large family is VERY appealing. I feel the seperation from family acutely and I REALLY miss the every day living near them. So anyway, wanted to let you know I know EXACTLY how you are feeling, and feel the same way. Making friends is tough for me too - takes me a long time to feel like I have a good friend. And, I don’t know if you feel the same way or not, but as good as friends can be, I still always like being with my family just that much more.
Well, good luck with it all!!!